


The Things I Say When You Sleep

by beckettjoy



Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Drinking, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Pining, more tags will be added, no beta we die like men, very giggly fools
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-03
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:22:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23430868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beckettjoy/pseuds/beckettjoy
Summary: Now you’re asleep but I’m gonna say it anyway, telling you things that I find hard to say, like I love you, I love you, I love you.orCody and Obi-Wan are both fools.
Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi
Comments: 18
Kudos: 173





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by the song of the same name, by Nina Nesbitt.
> 
> Translation of the Mando'a is at the end.

Cody’s knees almost buckle under the weight of his general stumbling into him, throwing an arm around Cody’s shoulders, head titled back with laughter. 

“Come on—” Cody breaks off, giggling as well, trying to urge Obi-Wan to keep walking,“ _Sir_ , we have to…it’s _late_.”

Rather than listen, Obi-Wan crumbles down to the ground, gesturing vaguely towards the sky. “But it’s so nice here Cod-commander, there’s so many lights.” 

Suddenly, the ground looks like a great option, and before Cody’s even conscious of realizing this, he’s on his knees next to Obi-Wan, peering over the drop-off nearby, ships whizzing by, lights getting more faded as the levels descend. 

Now they’re lying down, Obi-Wan on his back, Cody stretched on his stomach next to him, sides pressed together, wheezing with laughter even though neither of them has said anything particularly funny. 

Obi-Wan’s commlink goes off; he fumbles to accept the message; Cody hopes vaguely that it’s not anyone important, who could get him in trouble.

“Obi-Wan? Where are you?” It’s General Skywalker, luckily.

“On the ground, Anakin,” Obi-Wan says through giggles, “I don’t…I don’t know why…”

“Are you drunk?” Skywalker asks, slightly exasperated, but with an undercurrent of…relief?

“Ah…well, you don’t have to worry about me being around, you can have your time with Padmé.”

Cody’s head snaps up to look at Obi-Wan, eyes wide with questioning, trying and failing to stifle more giggles. 

“ _Master_ , I’m not—” Skywalker sputters, but is overpowered by Cody and Obi-Wan’s raucous laughter. 

A few Twi’leks walking by glance down in concern, but apparently noticing that they’re a Jedi and solider, keep on their way. 

Skywalker scoffs. “Okay, well, it’s just the same as you and—”

Obi-Wan snaps off the commlink with surprising reflexes, smoothing an anxious hand through his hair; Cody raises an eyebrow but decides not to pursue. If Obi-Wan has a secret lover too, well…he’d rather not hear anything about that. 

“We should, we have to…” Obi-Wan starts, sitting up and waving a hand around, now not laughing anymore. 

Cody just nods, picking himself off the ground and standing all the way up after only three tries; Obi-Wan needs to use Cody’s hand to pull himself up. 

“I can’t…my men…I would _not_ be a good example,” Cody says as they stumble down the street, knowing he’s too far gone to pretend like he hasn’t been drinking in front of his men, and knowing he’d be incredibly embarrassed to let them see him in this state. He has nowhere else to go, though, unless he finds some place open through the night to just camp out, get some caf, wait it out until he’s sober enough to go back—

“Sleep with me,” Obi-Wan replies, slightly too loudly, and then cringes knocking his shoulder into Cody’s again. “I mean, Cody, you can come with me, sleep where I am…sleep, there’s no men there at all…none brothers.”

Well, he’s not going to turn that down. A much better option.

Obi-Wan’s chambers in the Jedi Temple are unsurprisingly small, modest; although normally Cody would be drinking in any details about Obi-Wan as he could, in his current mental state, all Cody can think about is getting out of his clothes and lying down. After spending his life almost consistently surrounded by his brothers, with not an ounce of shame among them (honestly much helped by the fact that they all share the same body), he undresses without thinking, only dimly aware of Obi-Wan doing the same on the other side of the room. By the time Cody’s eyes have caught up with his mind, though, Obi-Wan is already stretched out in his bed, blankets covering everything but the top of his head. 

Cody stands for a moment, blinking, realizing the gravity of the situation, having only one bed. But Obi-Wan brought him here, is definitely occupying only the right side of the bed. Had Cody’s head not been swimming with alcohol he likely would have made a different decision, but as it stands his impulsivity is through the roof, so he just tucks himself into bed next to his general. 

“G’night, Cody,” Obi-Wan mumbles, turning slightly to smile over his shoulder, before passing out. 

Suddenly, Cody feels wide awake. 

He lies in darkness for what feels like hours, desperately trying to make his head stop spinning, thinking about everything _but_ the sound of Obi-Wan’s heavy breathing so close to his ear. 

“Sir? Are you awake?” he whispers. No response.

Cody isn’t really sure why he starts talking at all; it’s like something comes over him, even more than the alcohol, compelling him to spill what he’d been saving up in his heart for the past several long months. 

“Sir, I…I could never say so if you were awake, if you were listening, but,” Cody whispers to the ceiling, and his next words come out in a rush, “I… _mirdi gar’mesh’la. Ni vercopaani ni reta’tayli, aala yaim’la ti gar. Ni copaani gar cuyir ner…cyar’ika…ni kar’tayl gar darasuum._ ” For a few long moments, Cody lies in silence, not really able to believe that he said it aloud. Then his brain catches up with his mouth and he snaps his eyes over to Obi-Wan’s dark form, trying to assess whether he’s actually asleep. Surely, if not, he would give some indication? Say something?

“General? Sir?” Cody says as quietly as possible, making sure he doesn’t wake Obi-Wan; he _had_ after all checked in before saying anything, so the chances of him having been heard are slim-to-none. Also, Cody has no idea what his grasp of Mando’a is; even if Obi-Wan had been awake, he isn’t sure how much would have even been comprehensible. 

Obi-Wan stays silent, chest rising and falling slowly and steadily, nothing to indicate he’s anything but in an alcohol-induced sound sleep.

— — —

When Cody wakes the next morning, squinting at the harsh light pouring through the windows, head pounding, he remembers nothing.

_Obi-Wan remembers everything._

— — —

“I know I say this every time but…I’m never getting drunk again,” Cody grumbles to himself, expecting to hear some razzing, and the the general clamor of his brothers around the barracks. Instead, he’s hit with silence, and a heartbeat later he realizes that this is _not his bed_ and the barracks do _not normally smell like breakfast_. 

He lurches up, which makes his head spin, taking in the room and trying to assess where the hell he is, when someone in an incredibly fluffy robe walks in the doorway.

“Good morning, Cody,” Obi-Wan says simply, “How are you feeling?”

Cody chokes on his own breath, blinking rapidly as if the man standing before him is going to disappear one of the times that Cody opens his eyes, trying to process the situation as best he can when his brain is just…screaming. 

“This is where you live? Why am I here?” Cody manages to ask, gesturing vaguely. 

Several emotions flash over Obi-Wan’s face, too quick for Cody to discern; Obi-Wan finally settles on confusion. 

“I lose my memory very easily when I drink,” Cody explains, guessing the questions, “but I’m glad I ended up somewhere safe, at least.”

Obi-Wan smiles, and then points to the floor next to Cody’s side of the bed.

“I collected and folded your clothes there; breakfast is through here when you’re dressed.” With that, he turns and heads back through the door, in the direction of the wonderful smells.

 _My clothes?_ Cody thinks, suddenly becoming aware of the fact that he’s _naked_ under the blankets. 

Mind racing with anxieties about what he may have done last night, Cody quickly slips on his clothes and checks his reflection in the mirror hanging across from Obi-Wan’s bed. He’s not sure why; it’s not like he expects to look any different, and his hair isn’t long enough to get messed up by sleep. Other than sightly bloodshot eyes framed by a couple new dark circles, he looks exactly the same as he always has; seeing himself in the mirror, seeing the same, boring face that currently runs around under millions of helmets, Cody reminds himself that nothing about him is special, and the chances are slim-to-none that anything…happened with his general last night. And even if Obi-Wan decided he wanted to experiment with fucking one of his soldiers, it’s not like he would pick _Cody_. 

Besides, waking up naked means nothing, isn’t unusual; Cody’s slept naked plenty of times surround by brothers in the barracks, and he certainly hasn’t fucked any of them. 

Shaking his head to clear it, Cody follows the way Obi-Wan went, stepping into a kitchen area, modest like the bedroom, where Obi-Wan is sitting at a small round table which is set for a meal.

Obi-Wan smiles mildly when he sees Cody, gesturing to sit. He almost groans aloud at seeing the rich spread of eggs, sausage, and fresh waffles, still steaming, set before him. 

Various gratitudes tumbling out — all of which Obi-Wan waves off — Cody digs into the food, torn between wanting to hoarf it all down, and wanting to go slow and savor it; this is probably the last time he’ll have a fresh Jedi-cooked breakfast, especially one made by Obi-Wan, and the memory needs to get him through the hundreds of military meals stretching into the foreseeable future. 

“How much exactly do you remember from last night?” Obi-Wan asks, attempting to appear casual by keeping his eyes down on the waffle he’s cutting, but his slightly shaky tone, and the way his voice goes unnaturally high at the end, betray him.

A slight sinking sensation in Cody’s stomach. “Nothing after about the eighth drink, when that Zabrak was trying to seduce you. What…um, did I do anything embarrassing? Untoward?” _Please don’t say I said anything to you…tried anything…did anything that would jeopardize our friendship, or working relationship…or my position as a commander._

Obi-Wan is silent for several long moments, the flush on Cody’s face deepening in direct correlation with his anxiety rising higher each second. “Sir, I have been known to act very strange while drunk, say and do things I don’t mean at all, and if I—”

“No, no, don’t worry,” Obi-Wan finally answers, doing nothing to quell Cody’s worries. Seemingly realizing how weak his denial is, Obi-Wan continues: “We both made slight fools of ourselves, in the normal way anybody does while incredibly inebriated. Nothing to worry about, though, nothing more than that.” 

Cody lets out a breath he hadn’t been conscious of holding, shoulders dropping down with relief. That was too close of call; he can’t ever get drunk around Obi-Wan again, at least until he squashes out the feelings he has for the general. He’d been trying, of course, from the moment he realized he thought of Obi-Wan as more than his commanding officer, and then as more than his friend; the closer the two became, the worse his feelings developed. This morning is…certainly not helping the plight, not with how adorable Obi-Wan looks with his head framed by the fluffs of his robe, back of his hair sticking up from sleep, eyelids still a bit droopy, and his guard down in a way Cody hasn’t seen before. Unsurprisingly; of course Obi-Wan is relaxed at his home versus on the battlefield. It doesn’t mean it’s any less lovely to Cody, though. Oh, to be able to see comfortable sleepy Obi-Wan every morning for the rest of his life. 

“All good?” Obi-Wan asks, and Cody realizes he’s been staring vaguely into the space over Obi-Wan’s shoulder, fork paused halfway to his mouth. 

“Yes, sir, just, uh, not quite awake,” Cody says quickly, stuffing a large bite into his mouth so he doesn’t have to speak further for a moment. 

“I’m glad you like it all.” Obi-Wan sighs, looking down at his hands, which are squeezed together in an uncharacteristic way. “You really don’t remember anything after that?”

Something happened. Something definitely happened. 

“ _Sir,_ if I did anything, if anything happened, no I don’t remember but please…” Cody says, cupping his face in his hands and rubbing his temples. 

Obi-Wan laughs; it sounds natural but oddly insincere. “Don’t worry, Cody, it’s me who was the fool.” 

In all of his worrying, and mind running through possibilities, somehow Cody had missed the idea that Obi-Wan did something embarrassing he’s glad Cody doesn’t remember. 

With that finally out of the way, Cody satisfied that he didn’t try to seduce his general or confess his feelings or anything of the sort, and Obi-Wan apparently satisfied that Cody truly lost his memory, they pass the rest of the meal slowly talking about anything that comes to mind, but both consciously (difficulty) trying to avoid any conversation around war. 

“This was the best meal I’ve had in a long time,” Obi-Wan confesses, as he walks Cody to the door after the commander had finally insisted he should be getting back to his men. “I don’t really get the chance to cook for anyone else. You’re welcome to come back any time you want.” 

Cody knows it’s sincere. 

“I would certainly enjoy that, general. I’ll see you later. Hopefully under equally pleasant circumstances.” They both know that won’t be the case, that the next time their paths cross it will be on a ship headed to wherever they’re risking their lives next. 

When Obi-Wan pauses at the door, Cody wishes he could give Obi-Wan a hug, feel the warmth of their bodies pressed together, bury his face in the side of his generals neck. 

Instead, he settles for a nod and an awkward wave which he knows he’ll beat himself up for later, using all of his willpower not to look back at Obi-Wan as he heads down the temple hallway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Hopefully this will update soon; I would love to know what you think in the meantime.
> 
> I tried my best with the Mando'a; what Cody said is: "I think you’re beautiful. I wish I could hold you, I feel comfortable/at home with you, I want you to be mine…darling…I love you."
> 
> Also, it hurt me to write him thinking he isn't special because he's a clone and I want to make it very clear that is him the character saying that and _does not reflect how I feel about them I love them all._
> 
> I'm on tumblr at [ct-rex ](http://ct-rex.tumblr.com)


	2. Chapter 2

The general and commander were sitting together, both occupied with their datapads and mission reports and clerical work, Obi-Wan sipping idly on a now-lukewarm mug of tea; Cody finishing the dregs of his fourth steaming cup of caf. 

“Want me to get you anything?” Cody asks, heading into the kitchenette to refill his mug. 

“Don’t you think that’s quite enough for now?” Obi-Wan asks from where he’s nestled on his bed across the room, not having to look up from his work to know what Cody’s up to. “And no thank you, I’m alright for now.”

Bringing the hot mug up near his face to get some warmth, Cody shakes his head. “I’m totally good, I’m totally vibing, I feel great. I love this stuff. This is what gets me through all this work, like yeah it’s nice being safe and stuff up on this cruiser but when there’s a battle going on, there’s the adrenaline, the high stakes, it keeps my blood hot, I need this artificial energy whatever to keep me going up here, you know? You know?”

Obi-Wan just stares at him for a moment, one eyebrow raised, a smile ticking the corners of his mouth. “I think that’s the most words I have _ever_ heard you say in conjunction. I think that’s quite enough energy for now.” 

“I’m fine, I’m fine, I’m fine.”

“You’re physically vibrating. Sit down.” 

Cody does as Obi-Wan says, picking his datapad off the table in front of him, muttering to himself about how much he’s going to get done. But not before downing half of his new mug in one long pull. 

The pair had become much more comfortable with each other, and had begun spending much more time together, the catalyst being the night and morning spent together on Coruscant several months ago. Cody knows it’s great for their working relationship; having commanding officers that get along well, are on the same page, creates a good environment for the troops; however, it serves to worsen his feelings for Obi-Wan every time they share a work shift in the general’s quarters, a smile at an in-joke, a knowing look behind troops’ backs, an evening huddled in a tent on a warn-torn planet. Sometimes, Obi-Wan will accidentally brush against Cody and the spot will burn under his armor for many moments after, Cody losing himself in imagining what it would be like to have skin-to-skin contact instead. 

Sometimes, in rare quiet times on the Negotiator, Cody will steal a moment for himself in his own quarters, letting his imagination consume him. Fantasies about Obi-Wan running his hands or his mouth over Cody’s skin; pinned to the wall by his wrists and Cody’s hips; hot breath ghosting over Cody’s neck and ear; spread out on display for him; on his knees with Cody’s fingers leaving bruises on his waist. The images, and Cody’s hand, bring him brief instances of pure joy, rivaling the rushes he gets from Obi-Wan’s physical presence. 

Afterwards, while cleaning himself off and snapping back into reality, Cody will find himself burning with the hidden shame, berating himself for having such thoughts about his commanding officer, much less acting on said thoughts, even in solitude. _Just forget about it_ , he tries to command his subconscious, _It’s not constructive. Nothing good will come out of this. He’s never going to want you back. Not you. Stop making a fool of yourself._

At the present: 

“Sir, I should be getting going,” Cody says some time later, setting down his empty mug, “I have a meeting with the captains in an hour, and should be having some food, maybe a shower, before then.” 

There’s no reply; Cody glances from up from the last of the reports on his datapad, to Obi-Wan across the room, who’s now leaned against the wall behind his bed, cross-legged with his datapad having fallen into his lap, neck bent in a slightly unnatural angle, mouth hanging open. 

“…Sir?” 

A light snore is the general’s only answer. 

Sighing, Cody walks over to the bed, softly nudging Obi-Wan on the shoulder in an attempt to wake him. Obi-Wan just shuffles slightly, head drooping farther back. Cody grabs Obi-Wan’s datapad, tapping through until he finds the general’s schedule; nothing for several hours. He decides to set an alarm, just in case, and also types out a quick note explaining the situation, in case Obi-Wan wakes in confusion to find Cody gone. 

Even in such an awkward position, Obi-Wan manages to look graceful, and Cody is quite reluctant to disturb him. Come to think of it, Cody doesn’t remember the last time he knows Obi-Wan slept soundly; he’s always sending messages throughout the shifts he’s supposed to be asleep on the ship, and when they’re on the ground, is awake when Cody and the men go to sleep, and is already up and puttering around the camp when they wake. 

Gently, Cody maneuvers Obi-Wan so that he’s lying down properly. He contemplates for a moment taking off some of Obi-Wan’s clothes; the rough tunic can’t be comfortable to sleep in, but he’s stopped by the fear of waking Obi-Wan, and the voice in the back of his mind telling him that would be too much, a violation. Cody settles for pulling the blanket over his shoulders and — he can’t stop himself — smoothing Obi-Wan’s hair down, marveling at the wonderful softness.

As if caught in a magnetic force, Cody leans over Obi-Wan’s form, blankets forming a protective barrier of plausible deniability, should Obi-Wan suddenly wake and see how close Cody is. Cody’s fingertips ghost over Obi-Wan’s side, the dip just above his hips, the swell where his thigh joins his torso. 

Even though — perhaps because — Obi-Wan is asleep and therefore won’t hear nor process anything that happens around him, Cody is overcome with the urge to tell Obi-Wan that he has fallen in love. Maybe it’s their proximity, maybe it’s his brain vibrating with too much caf, maybe it’s something else, bigger than either of them in that small room. 

Cody hesitates. Something about the situation seems oddly familiar, but he can’t put his finger on why. Obi-Wan has never fallen asleep around him like this that he can remember, and Cody hasn’t ever confessed repressed, hopeless love to anyone before. 

Not fully confident in the deepness of Obi-Wan’s slumber, Cody opts for the quickest and simplest thing he can say, but still feels as though he’s pouring his heart out when he whispers, “I love you.” 

His eyes search nervously over Obi-Wan’s face, watching for a sign of recognition or consciousness, but Obi-Wan is perfectly still, just his chest rising and falling slowly under Cody’s hand. With a relieved sigh, Cody watches him for several more minutes, drinking in as many details as he can to hold himself over indefinitely; chances are, he’ll never get another opportunity to sit and watch Obi-Wan in calm, quiet sleep again. Seemingly out of nowwhere, Cody is overcome with a swell of emotion, feeling as though someone has reached inside his chest with a viselike grip on his heart; he can barely breathe; he presses shaking hands to his face, grinding palms into his eyes; bites his lip so hard he tastes the metallic tang of blood. 

Cody jumps up, head spinning, and heads straight out of the room. Pausing in the hallway, forehead pressed against the wall, he tries to regain control of his thoughts and breathing.

“Commander Cody, sir, are you alright?” 

A tentative, but warm, hand on his shoulder. He can’t help but lean into the welcome touch.

Cody tilts his head just enough to see the trooper standing next to him: their medic, Helix, eyebrows smushed together in genuine concern. 

With a forced smile, Cody says, “I’m fine.”

The medic looks wholly unconvinced. “Are you sure you don’t need me to check you out, sir? It’s been a while since—”

“I said, I’m fine,” Cody snaps, now fully turning to face his brother. He immediately regrets his harsh tone, softening with his next words. “There’s nothing to check out, nothing wrong with me physically.”

Helix takes a deep breath and looks his commander straight in the eyes. “Physically, sure, but what about mentally? If there’s anything you might need to talk about…”

Cody meets his gaze for a pregnant pause, aware of how his jaw is quivering, trying desperately to make it stop, knowing that if he replies, his voice will betray him, will crack. Instead he just nods, too rapidly; the medic knows it’s bullshit, but Cody is hurrying down the hallway before he can make any protest. 

After his meeting and a meal he barely remembers, Cody retreats to the training area; a few hours of target practice and sparring will serve to clear his head well. He’s selecting a blaster when the voices of a couple brothers drift through the doorway to the sparring area. 

“I thought the Jedi didn’t do that? Attachments?”

“They’re not supposed to, but that’s what I’ve heard some of the vode saying.” 

The next part is muffled, Cody can just make out the end: “…der and our general? I guess I could imagine it, they’re essentially equals.” 

_Their general? Attachment to someone?_ Curiosity certainly piqued, Cody silently steps closer to the doorway, ears straining to catch all the words. 

“Listen, this is just a rumor, but that’s what they say, that Kenobi is _in love_.”

“How could anyone possibly know that?”

“Supposedly, a couple brothers have overheard him talking to General Skywalker about it. I heard from Wooley. He has some friends in the 501st who asked Rex, but he just told them it was none of their business. That’s not a denial though.”

There’s another pause, and some shuffling noises. Cody’s heart is in his throat. _Obi-Wan is in love with someone?_

“I wonder if it’s reciprocated? That would be so weird if they…were together. I wouldn’t want to have to witness anything of that. Can the Jedi even be ‘together’ with someone?”

_So it’s someone close by, who’s around equal status to the general? Someone who the troopers are familiar with, would be worried about anything happening in front of them, meaning it’s someone who is around them at least sometimes._ At the present, Cody can’t think of anyone who fits that criteria. 

“It hasn’t stopped Skywalker and his senator. Rumor has it, they’re _married_. I wonder if Kenobi and—”

There’s a loud bang; Cody nearly jumps out of his skin before realizing it’s the sound of the blaster he dropped while so preoccupied with eavesdropping. Face reddening, he snatches up the weapon and quickly busies himself with preparing the targets, in case the other troopers come looking for the source of the noise. 

Sure enough, two heads poke around the doorway not a moment too soon, eyes going oddly wide when they spot Cody there. Probably worried about getting caught idling around when they should be training. 

“Sir,” they say in unison; Cody just nods at them, trying to act as casual as possible while his mind is repeatedly screaming that _the man he is in love with, is in love with someone._

His brothers exchange a strange glance before retreating swiftly the way they came. Cody turns and starts blasting training droids, willingly losing himself in the mindless task ahead of him.

Only hours later, when Cody’s alone in his dark quarters, does he let an idea push faintly into his mind, the idea that the mysterious person could be _him,_ that _he_ fits the description the troopers were discussing. _It couldn’t be. Never in a million years. Why would Obi-Wan feel that way about_ him _? Love?_.

Nevertheless, the fantasy brings a smile to Cody’s face and helps lull him into a contented sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I'd love to know what y'all think of this.
> 
> Also I, for once in my life, actually planned this out, so I should be updating soon again, and there's probably just two more chapters to go.
> 
> I'm on tumblr at [ct-rex ](http://ct-rex.tumblr.com)


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